Time Marches On

I have been very bored.  With the exception of girls night last Saturday.  It was fun and much needed.  My husband was not too thrilled when I got home 4 hours after I said I would, but oh well.  When he goes out he stays out way later than I did on Saturnday night.

Trying to keep the house in its current state of cleanliness has been a challenge.  I painted Cooper's room for two reasons.  I was bored. And I didnt want to do the dishes right then.  Plus it desperately needed to be done.  I guess that was 3 reasons.

I can't believe how fast this month has seemed to fly by.  As bored as I have been.  I thought time only flies when you are having fun.   I have not been having fun.  Cooper's behavior is getting worse.  I'm at my wit's end of what to do to correct him.  He hits me, throws toys at me, throws a temper tantrum constantly, ignores me when I tell him no.  I just don't know what to do anymore.  Time outs do not work.  Nothing works.  Which means that I can not wait to go back to work.  Then Rusty can deal with him.  Some days I just want to lock myself in my room and never come out.  But the door's broken and no longer even shuts the right way.  The only peace I find is locking myself in the bathroom and taking a shower even though I've already taken one.  I must be the cleanest person I know now, but that is even not peaceful.  He stands at the door banging on it and screaming.  The water's not loud enough to muffle the sound.

I know I'm not the only parent to feel this way.  But I feel guilty for having these feelings anyways.

Last night Cooper was so bad!  I just wanted to take him and beat him, but then he would've screamed and cried more.  It didnt help that his dad was back in video game land and wouldn't come help.  Some days I'd like to take my  husband and beat the crap out of him.

I know that being a mother is a 24/7 job, but would it kill the man to give me a half hour break?  Take the kid outside to play, or to his room and play with him.  Something.  So I can have a minute to myself. 

I love my son.  But sometimes, I need time for myself.  And waiting every 3 months for girls night to roll around is not cutting it.  Rusty needs to get his ass off the couch and do something with this kid.  Cooper is bored and wants attention.  He wants someone to play with him.  And he does ask Rusty.  I try, but he gets mad because I dont play with the cars right or whatever and goes back to asking his daddy.  And his daddy is too busy with video games and rc trucks and watching tv and eating.  Its frustrating.

Ive tried to talk to Rusty.  He doesnt listen.  So I guess I just needed to get that out.  Thanks for listening.